Part FortyEight;; "Somebody's gonna hurt someone before the night is through."

Previously on "Across the Universe":
- Mishary is getting jealous.
- Mishary also has a girl in his life, but i dont know who....yet.
- Yousef and i are going to be "Friends", this should be interesting.
- I was in the car with D, on the way to Maki to meet with Ghazi and Fajoura.

---------

1st of September
Khaleej street
6:30PM

We just passed Friday's.

"Whatever happened to Haya?" D asked.

"DON'T MENTION HER, everytime we mention her name, she pops back into my life!" I said.

"Haha i know, it's scary!" She said.

"Tell me about it!" I said.

"But seriously, where did she disappear?" She asked.

"I don't know, and i dont care!" I said.

"How is the situation with Mishary and you?" she asked.

"I don't know,i really dont know, he's clearly jealous, yet he didn't open up for me yet, plus the fact that he has a girl in his life!" I said. "It's too complicated, i dont think i can deal with it right now!" I said.

"But you do like him right?" She said. Curiously.

"I think i do, but it's hard to wait for something i know may never happen but it's even harder when you know it's everything you want!" I said.

"OMG!" She said.

"What?" I said and turned to her.

"Do you realise what you just said?" She said.

"That...i...like....him?" I said.

"NO!! you love him!" She said.

"I do?" I said. Confused.

"Yess! obviously, you have strong feelings for him, you cant give up Dayoum!" She said.

"Who said anything about giving up? do you not know me at all? i rather fail knowing i tried my best, than give up and live with not knowing what might've happened." I said.

"Awwhh, Dayouma, you're a grown up!" She said.

"Shqa9dech!?" I said.

"I mean you finally think straight!" She said.

"Haa? Shqa9dech!?" I repeated.

"Haha nothing, i'm just admiring your new way of thinking!" She said.

"Hmm...okay" I said.

We gave the car to the Valet parking and entered Maki.

Ghazi and fajoura were already there, Ghazi looked handsome, Fajoura was pretty.

They stood up as we approached them and exchanged formalities.

We got seated and took about 5 minutes to check the menues, well Fajoura needed the 5 minutes apparently me, ghazi and D were ready to order.

Each ordered the dish they preferred, and we chatted, i saw Ghazi giving D a few glances, and they weren't normal ones, there was something, something he's hiding, he's afraid to show his feelings, why do most guys - if not all - hide their true feelings? are they afraid of commitment? or are they just afraid of love?

I quickly excused myself to go to the bathroom after i saw Khaled entering Maki.

I texted D,
"Shit, Khaled is here!" I sent.

I waited in the bathroom for a reply.
*BEEP*
"Oh, that's bad, he noticed me, he remembers my face!" she replied.

"GREAT!...OH SHIT! He knows Ghazi too!!!" I sent
*BEEP*
I read;
"Oh, that's like.. Double bad, well, you need to come back, because fajoura is asking about you!"

I pushed some confidence in me and a little of strenght and exited the bathroom, to head to our table.
I thought;
'why should i care?'
'what can he do?'
'what will he do?'

I enetered Maki, since the bathroom is located outside.
Khaled turned to look at me, i gave him the coldest stare and sat back in my seat.

Each ordered their own edemame spicey, except for Ghazi, he oredered the spicey and the salty one.
Who can blame him? he's a guy.

We finished the evening, and it was really really fun, i have a great time, so did everyone.
Khaled was staring too much, and Ghazi noticed, and to my luck he remembers khaled.

"Isn't he the guy that.." He said.

"Yes yes, it's him!" I said.

"Do you know him?" He asked.

and here i was trying to swallow and i hoped the moment pass quickly.

"No, he's been bothering and following Dayouma ever since we first saw him, in albedi3" D said, covering my ass.

"Oh.." He said.

"Thank you!" I whispered to D.

We walked 3al ba7ar shwaya enha'9im what we ate, even though Maki never made me feel soo FULL, i absolutely love that about it!

It was 9 and i ended the night.

"D we should go back home, i promised Khali that i'll be back early, and im assuming early to him is when he gets back home, im there, he usualy is back around 10." I said.

"Ohh, okay!" D said, dissapointed, she was having a great time with Ghazi...& fajoura.

"Yalla ma 3laiih, ilyayat akthar enshallah." Ghazi said.

"Enshallah" I said and smiled.

"It was really nice seeing you and catching up, dayoum, we shoud do this more often!" Fajoura said.

"Yeah it really was, definitely." I said.

"Inshallah inshoufich, w tra i'm holding a DJ party next week, you and D are the first to come, and you dont get to say no!" She said.

"We never say no to parties!" D said.
I nodded, agreeing.

We said goodbye and each got into their ride and went back home.
We got into D's car and headed back to my second home.
I couldn't wait to get back home, i want to see if Mishary will be curious about our evening dinner.

1st of September
Second home
10:20PM

I entered the house and there was no one in the livingroom downstairs, the house wa pretty empty.
ma3qoula no one is home?
Not even Janouya?

I went upstairs and got in my room.
I was home alone.

I opened my laptop and signed on msn.
as soon as i signed on, i saw the name "Hayouna - Methlik Geleel;*" Starting a conversation with me.

GREAT, you just had to mention her D!!
ugh.


Haya: Heyyy;p!

Me: What do you want?

Haya: excuse me?

Me: Haya, deshay bilmawthou3, what do you want?

Haya: nothing.

Me: I cant remember the last time you talked to me!

Haya: Hence why i'm talking now.

Me: No, i mean you don't talk to me at all, unless you're up to something.

Haya: Why don't you believe that people can change?

Me: Because i don't believe bullshit.

Haya: Well, believe it or not, i was thinking about you today, and i wanetd to know how you're doing with the whole break-up thing with Yousef.

HOW DID SHE KNOW?

Me: I'm sorry, what?

Haya: what? did i say something wrong? you did break up with him right?

Me: He's all yours Haya, goodbye!

I blocked her, temporarily.

I opened my inbox since i had 50 new emails.
I was checking my emails when a new msn message box appeared, "Yousef - USA." Has signed on.

I clicked on the box appeared and opened the conversation.

Me: How could you tell Haya about our break up!? you're actually over me that quick!?

Yousef: What?

Me: I was pretty clear.

Yousef: I don't know what you're talking about, i'm still trying to cope with the fact that you and i are no longer together, i'm having hard time believing that!

Me: Then how did haya know about it?

Yousef: I honestly don't know.

Me: Hmm okay.

Yousef: Dayouma can we talk about what we talked about earlier on the phone?

Me: What's there to talk about?

Yousef: Are you sure you're doing the right thing? us being friends only?

Me: I'm not sure it's the right thing, but i know i can't be with you anymore.

Yousef: Give me a good reason!

Me: Well, I can't pretend you didn't break my heart!

Yousef: Because i'm being jealous and missing you like crazy suddenly i broke your heart?

Me: No, you know what i'm talking about!

Yousef: no, tell me!

Me: I gave you a chance before, when you first did it, and i thought you actually deserved a second chance, now i have no idea what the hell i was thinking about, because apparently you're not the type that learn from their mistakes.

Yousef: You're making me sound like a really bad person, i'm not that bad!

Me: I know you're not a bad person, i know that, i can forgive you for what you did, and that's what i'm doing right now, but i cannot forget!

Yousef: But i really like you, still, Don't you?

Me: I liked you, past tense, i dont regret telling you i like you, i only regret not knowing what you thought of me!

Yousef: What do you mean?

Me: you know exactly what i mean.

Yousef: What can i do to make you understand that i'm regreting every second of my life i spent thinking that you might have a relationship with another guy! but one can't do anything about it, it's in the past.

Me: Yousef, you're making it soo hard for me! stop it please!

I pressed enter and i felt my heart feeling pressured.

Yousef: I'm sorry, is it wrong that i'm trying to fix things between us?

Me: There is nothing to fix!

Yousef: Yes there is, every problem can be solved.

Me: Not ours.

Yousef: Well i'm not convinced, i believe there is a sulotion to our situation, and i'm not gonna stop looking for it!

Me: Don't bother yourself, i'm saving you the time! don't look for a new sulotion, we did agree on being friends, don't make change my idea.

Yousef: (U) [for those who are not familiar with Msn emoticons, it's a broken heart]

Me: I'm sorry for something i didn't do.

Yousef: You're an amazing person, and any man is more than lucky to have you, i'm lucky enough to have known you!

Me: Thank you.

Yousef: wallah, honestly, you're the best thing that happened to me in my entire life, and i mean it, and no matter what, lovers, friends or nothing at all, i will always be grateful for the person you made me be. Even though i would love to be with you, but i rather to be friends with you than nobody to you.

Me: I changed you? and you will always be someone to me. Always.

Yousef: Are you kidding me? you turned me into whole new person. and i'm glad to know that.

Me: That's nice to know.

Yousef: :)

Me: Yousef, you're a great guy too, but sometimes you do stupid things, no offence.

Yousef: Well, i should do stupid things in order to learn.

Me: You're right, i'm glad you know that.

Yousef: Ofcourse.

Me: I'll talk to you later okay? i'm going to bed.

Yousef: Okay dayouma, take care.

Me: Enshallah, you too, goodnight.

Yousef: Goodnight.

i sighed out.

I turned off my laptop and layed in bed with only the nightlight on, i was thinking.

Are my feelings to Mishary effecting my judgements about Yousef?
Or am i actually a very strong person after all?

It was midnight and i still didn't sleep.

*knock knock*

"Who is it?" i said.

"Mishary" He said.

"Come in" I said and got my head off the pillow.

"Ohh sorry kntay nayma?" He said as he entered the room.

"No it's okay, i was trying to sleep!" I said.

"Ghareeba, it's too early!" He said.

"I know, but i was feeling tired." I said.

"Shfeech?! Are you okay?" He asked. Concered.

"I'm fine." I said.

"Are you sure?" He asked to confirm.

"I'm pretty sure!" I said.

I asked him to sit on the bed instead of standing near the door.

"Good, How is il6al3a?" He said as he sat on the edge of the bed.

"It was very nice, i had a nice time." I said.

"That's good, How is Ghazi?" He asked.

"He's alright." I said.

"W how is Fajoura? Is she still not that pretty?" He asked.

"She was always pretty." I said.

"Come one seriously, beever teeth?" He said.

"7aram 3laik, she's really pretty!" I said.

"Well, Braces do wonders!" He said.

"7ram 3laik!" I said.

"What? ma gelt shay ghala6, they are magical!" He continued his saracasm.

"Okay." I gave up argueing.

*Ring ring*
His phone was ringing.

"Sorry, i just.." He said and pressed the ignore button.

"You can take the call." I said.
more like i WANT you to take the call really, was it "THE" girl? i wondered.

"No it's okay, he can wait." He said.

Oh, it's a he.

"Okay." I said.

*Ring Ring*
His phone was ringing....again.

"Seriously, take the call!" I said.

"Okaay!" He said and picked the phone.
He seems like he really didn't want to.

"Aloo?"
"Halla shlounik? shloun ilahal? 3asaak ebkhaiir?"
"Laa, khosh, khalaa9 ana akalmik b3d shway okay, masghoul shway"
"Khala9, inshallah, faman illaah" He said and closed the phone.

I felt curious.

"Who was it?" I asked.

"Haa? it was....9a7bii jassoum!" He said, nervously.
Why soo scared mishary?
i wondered.

"Oh...okay, if its important tra 3adi, our conversation can wait." I said.

"Nope, i'm having fun talking to you." He said & winked.

I wanted to smile, but i knew he was lying about the phonecall.

"Don't wink." I said.

"Afa, laiish?" He said.

"Bs it's weird!" I said.

"How is it weird?" He asked.

"well, madry, it makes me feel like you're hitting on me!" I said. so innocently.

"What if i was?" He said.

"WhaT?!" I said. Surprised.

"I said 'WHAT IF'!" He said.

"Nothing, i was just saying it's weird!" I said.

"Okay." He said.

"Let's watch a movie!" I said.

"Yalla, ay movie?" He said.

"Madri, what do you have?" I said.

"What are you in the mood to watch? Action? horror?" He said.

"Action." I said.

"Really? I thought you might say romance and drama!" He said.

"Well, believe me when i say, i'm not like any girl." I said.

"Ohh, shay ydeed hatha!" He said.

"No, it's old news, but you just found out, i'm not shallow, i'm just confident" I said.

"You're also cool." He said.

"Thank you, you're not bad yourself." I said.

"Not bad? what does that suppose to mean?" he said.

"it means not bad!" I said.

"yumma minich" He said and poked me.

I giggled.

"Let me go get an action movie from my room." He said and got up and went to his room.

"Okay." I said. "Better be good." I added.

I was waiting for him to come back.
I layed my head on the pillow.

What's taking him so long? I thought.
He better be not ditching me for his friend "jassoum"!

I was laying in bed thinking of any reason that he's not back yet, anything
Bathroom maybe?
He fell and broke his leg?
He passed out?
...ANYTHING but the fact that he's talking to another girl as i'm waiting for him.
I failed to believe one other than that.

I tried to sleep while the song "complicated" by Carolyn Dawn Johnson was playing over and over in my head.

I'm so scared that the way that I feel

Is written all over my face

When you walk into the room

I want to find a hiding place

We used to laugh, we used to hug

The way that old friends do

But now a smile and a touch 'a your hand

Just makes me come unglued

It's such a contradiction

Do I lie or tell the truth

Is it fact or fiction

Oh, the way I feel for you

It's so complicated
I'm so frustrated
I wanna hold you close, I wanna push you away
I wanna make you go, I wanna make you stay
Should I say itShould I tell you how I feel
Oh, I want you to know
But then again I don't
It's so complicated (oh)

Just when I think I'm under control
I think I finally got a grip
Another friend tells me that
My name is always on your lips
They say I'm more than just a friend
They say I must be blind
Well, I admit that I've seen you watch me
From the corner of your eye
Oh, it's so confusing
Yeah, I wish you'd just confess
But think of what I'd be losing
If your answer wasn't yes

I hate it'
Cause I've waited
So long for someone like you
Oh, what do I do

Why should I say it
Should I tell you how I feel
Oh, I want you to know
But then again I don't
It's so complicated (complicated)
So complicated (complicated)
It's so complicated, oh

I dozzed of to sleep.


xoxo
- S™